now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
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