That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
my mom is pro-life. I dare you to fuck me.
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
so you ordered business cards online last night with a picture of your dick on them. you need to hide that new credit card when you drink
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
