She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
