My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
