i stopped calling them hangovers and started calling mornings a long time ago.
He said I came instead of I'm coming. I wonder if he noticed my state of confusion when I stopped blowing him.
Wasn't he an English major?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
I keep having to have that awkward "I don't want to have sex with you" convo. I thought wearing sweatpants was suppose to prevent this situation..
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize
