god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
How could I forget your birthday? I have an alarm in my phone to ask you for sex that day.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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