This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
Her boobs felt like beanie babies from heaven
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
You could at least care enough to fake an orgasm for me.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Randomize
