Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
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