chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
