she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Every minute you wait for the sex that's not gonna happen, we're missing a tone deaf, drunk, tard-asaurus rex half-sing a 90's song to a bunch of other dinotards at karaoke.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
