Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
Randomize
