I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
My alarm clock on my phone was changed to Fat Bottom Girls over the weekend, and I just now noticed. I'm actually okay w that after Mardi Gras. Well done, random. Well done.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
Randomize
