it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
