can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
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