i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I won't let penises inside me if you won't let tequila inside you, deal?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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