Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I'm not sure what happened. But I must have won because I obviously stole two full pitchers of beer from the bar and taped a note on them saying "your welcome"
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Randomize