I don't think brook has ever known best
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
We turned a watering can into a margarita bong.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
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