there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I couldnt give him head when all I could hear was his little brother playing the piano and this family singing along to it.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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