If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
