If a man's penis is referred to as "the family jewels" does that make a woman's vagina a jewelry box?
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
My mom just looked at me and said; "You've been pretty bitchy lately do you need some dick?" WTF has happened to me?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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