I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
My new sobriety test is "how many times do I have to attempt to put toothpaste on my brush"... It takes a while.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Happy Thanksgiving! Hope its not too awkward that your dad and your boyfriend are the same age.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
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