This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
broke the door off of my fridge tryin to have a indoor rodeo
The crowd is chanting "we want sex!" There's a man dressed as bacon. That is all
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
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