I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
oh man. maybe i should puke on his dick? just to test how much he loves me?
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize