like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
My uterus is doing all sorts of karate moves to break free of my body.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
