That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
Randomize
