That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize
