Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
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