I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Mother fucker. I'm a 30J now. I'm fucking speechless
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
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