I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I really need to get laid. I'm telling at least 10 girls that I love them tonight.
Odds are at least 1 out of those 10 girls will be as crazy as you and will be into it.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
