u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
