I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Apparently I promised everyone at the party I'd partake in various winter sports with them..
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
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