So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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