He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
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