Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
How long is the appropriate time period between a pregnancy scare and breaking up with my girlfriend?
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
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