soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
Duuuuuuuude, I need you to sleep with my girlfriend so I can tell you both to move out
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
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