perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Randomize
