I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
You sent her a pic of your dick with 'guess what you cant have anymore' written on it with a marker.
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
Oh god iv'e slept with this police officer before oh god oh god
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
How's the hangover?
I've been begging my dog to mercy kill me for over an hour. He has this look like he might do it, you know, as my best friend should.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
