So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
I don't care how high you are, you can't finger me while eating potato chips.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
How does it feel to date your dad?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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