Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Mom just told me I need to start having sex.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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