If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
Needless to say, wine tasting turned into wine chugging
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
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