the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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