we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
He was licking my ear while recommending that I shop at IKEA. I think he's my perfect guy.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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