Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
