man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
