my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
He tried to say "god bless your heart" to the stripper but it came out "god bless your pussy"
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I'm sorry you had to knock him out on your birthday. But that also means I won the bet that you'd hit someone so you owe me 40. dollars
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