I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Congratulations! We have a period
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
