i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Seriously where are the good guys?
The friend zone.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
