everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize