Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
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