She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
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