hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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